A few weeks ago, I had the excellent opportunity to meet a distinguished person, who handed over the book – Good to Great, by Jim Collins.
He guided me to a particular page and asked me to read the excerpt loudly. I was hesitant initially, but surrendering to the process, I started reading about “The Hedgehog concept”.
Many of you have already read the book or are familiar with the concept.
This was my first exposure to the concept and it intrigued me.
The concept was first mentioned by the Greek philosopher Archilochus and publicised by philosopher Isaiah Berlin in the 1950s.
Why did this concept have an immediate impact on me?
The author Jim Collins explains that the fox is a smart and cunning animal. He knows many things and attempts many ways to prey on the Hedgehog.
Every day the fox devices new methods to hunt the hedgehog, but remains unsuccessful.
The hedgehog, on the other hand, is a lazy animal and nocturnal. Sleeps mostly through the day and at night goes in search of food.
The fox is always waiting for the hedgehog to present itself.
The moment the hedgehog senses the presence of the fox, he rolls into a ball, making itself highly impenetrable.
The fox tries hard to penetrate into the non-spinal areas of the hedgehog, but with zero success.
When I finished reading this excerpt, I was thinking about the learnings from it.
Firstly the question is, am I a hedgehog or a fox? I still haven’t found the perfect answer.
From a professional aspect, I realized the hedgehog signifies depth and the fox width. In other terms, an expert or a generalist.
There is no one right answer. In one of my organizations, I had the opportunity to work with hedgehogs and foxes.
I particularly recollect two individuals – both in sales.
One, go-getter, social, splendid communicator, voracious reader, energetic, passionate, omnipresent, fast learner, and great people manager. This person is the fox.
The other, traditional in approach, unifocal and worked as per KRAs, empathetic, exceptional domain knowledge, voice opinions firmly, great team player and leader. This is the hedgehog
Both were great at their respective jobs. But when I reflect, the fox professional, started multiple initiatives which were beneficial for the business unit but wasn’t consistently able to achieve the targets.
The hedgehog wasn’t a great initiative taker, but consistently achieved all targets and many times surpassed them.
Who is the better professional? I want to duck this question but will still share my opinion. If you have an opinion, please share your comments.
I believe both are important. But the optimal/ideal combination is the Expert-Generalist.
The Expert-Generalist
A mix of the hedgehog and the fox.
Personally, I’m still hugely a fox and this concept has opened my eyes to learning more to adopt the traits of a hedgehog. Find a unified objective and keep at it.
Yesterday, as I was again reading this concept, generally popped into my head, which Indian brands are hedgehogs.
The brand that came to my head is Lijjad Pappad. Started in 1959, by a group of 7 women with a capital fund of Rs. 80, today they have 45,000 Lijjad sisters, making millions of papads, with a turnover of INR 1600 Cr.
They did mainly two things – employed women and made pappads.
I’m sure there are many such hedgehog brands in India, who have made it big and a force to reckon with.
If some hedgehog brands do pop in your head too, please share them. Would love to learn about them.
In conclusion, hedgehog or fox, I believe for me the hedgehog seems like the future, as its simple, clear and focused. But it requires unlearning and transformation, which I do hope to master in a few years to come.
On 8th March, women’s day, I saw this print ad (still read newspapers) on the front cover of Bombay Times or Times Of India.
Source: afaqs.com
Honestly, I did not read too much into the ad. But it did make me realize that I must contribute more at home.
Now, during the day, I received a enlightening post from a friend, reads as below:
Today we saw messages and forwards galore telling you to spare a thought for the woman, the wife, the sister, the daughter, the mother, the mother-in-law, the aunt, the grandmother, the grandmother’s grandmother’s niece and many other women, dead and alive in our lives.
But today, I want to spare a thought for a few other women:
For the college student who wants pursue her sports and attend extra practice sessions but her family won’t let her because it’s not safe for young girls and women to be out after sunset.
For the girls who got late for school because there was a long queue at the community water tap and they had to fill water in all the small and big vessels at home before leaving for school.
For the 35-year-old woman who left her home with her two kids because the domestic violence was unbearable.
For the homemaker who cringes at the thought of walking through the crowded market during rush hours for fear of being groped.
On Women’s Day, we absolutely must celebrate what we have – freedom to choose and live a happy, productive life. But there are many women around us who don’t have that choice. And many thousands before us who struggled to get us here.
Happy Women’s Day!
A friend’s post on International Women’s day.
It took me a while, but today morning, I realized that it’s just not about equal share, it’s also about equal access to the basic needs of women. There is certain action being taken, but I’m sure there are huge gaps to be filled.
In this aspect, I deeply urge Ariel to also think about building access for women in Rural India, be it laundry, water or electricity.
How about creating a “Mobile Laundry” – equipped with Washing machines, water, power to run the washing machines and definitely washing powder, to women across villages in remote parts of India.
Doesn’t have to be done daily, but even if the laundry provides weekly twice, women to walk up to the laundry, get their clothes washed (free or at minimal cost), imagine the access you will be providing them.
I’m not sure if this has already been implemented or is in process. But, I believe that will also be a great contribution for women, not just in Urban, but in rural India as well. Also Ariel if you feel this idea is explorable, I will be happy to collaborate with your brand.
As for your campaign of #Sharetheload, requires conditional and behavioral change. From a place of being PROVIDERS to being CONTRIBUTORS, in their thinking.
When a husband gives / shares money with his wife or mother, who is a homemaker or professional, he should not think of it as providing, but as a contribution or privilege he receives from the efforts of managing the house.
Also, contribution doesn’t in any sense attribute to charity. And of course, the contributions go beyond monetary aspects. This is a learning for me as well.
There are men (my brother, my BIL, cousin and a close friend) who are living examples of #sharingtheload. I’m ever yearning & learning to be as them in many aspects.
All we need to be is #bettermen.
“You make me want to be a better man.” Always say this to your wife or mother whenever you are sharing load with her.
from the movie As Good As It Gets.
My intention is to share a thought and if in the process, it has condemned or offended any person, my sincerest apologies.
I was visiting a close friend in Nasik and wondering what gift should I carry for his 2-year-old son. Coincidentally, I was collaborating with a healthy snack start-up – The Growing Giraffe, based in Mumbai. BAM! I thought there couldn’t be a better gift than a healthy snack. I quickly ordered a cookie box from The Growing Giraffe and gave it to my friend. His son really enjoyed the cookie, filled with jaggery, quinoa, almonds, and a whole list of ingredients. My friend mentioned that if his son enjoyed it, he would order more.
The last few days, thanks to my collaboration with The Growing Giraffe, had the opportunity to research and study the Healthy snack category in India. So sharing certain, and hopefully interesting basic trends and info from this category.
Snacking is and will always continue to be an integral part of our food consumption. Of course, the focus of snacking has largely been on taste for the majority of the population, versus health requirements.
Today the trends are changing. Parents seek healthier options and many start-ups are making it easier for these health-conscious parents to buy such products.
Market size:
The packaged snack industry is estimated at US$ 4Bn (INR 1 lac crore), highly dominated by large conglomerates i.e. ITC and Britannia.
As per a Euromonitor International report, \with people increasingly becoming health conscious, the healthy food market in India in 2016 was estimated at Rs 26,000 crore.
Nuts/Seeds/Trail have 41% of revenue share, while bars have 20% revenue share.
Global snack market. Will grow to US$ 98 Bn by 2025.
Trends:
In today’s market, most customers are consuming hygienically packed snacks.
The knack of snacks has changed drastically over the last decade.
The urban population is steadily grasping the nutrition aspect of snacking and understanding the adverse or zero value it’s serving their children.
It’s not just the pandemic that increasing the consumption of healthy snacks, evolved mothers are obsessed with their children’s health.
With the growth of nuclear families, parenting has become intense and deeper science, children have become projects, a lot of investment is going into raising them.
With this obsession and investment, nutrition and health snack brands are gaining traction, however much is to see if this is a fad or a long-term journey.
Health tracking has started becoming an integral part of child/children’s lives.
The shift in dietary patterns, preventive over curative.
Start-ups that are selling health snacks for kids:
The Growing Giraffe
Timios
True Elements
Soulfull
Snackible
Mego Foods
The whole truth
The Mumum Co.
Eat anytime
Hungry Foals
Lil Goodness
Happilo
Today, I’m sharing the journey of Rukmini Banerji – Founder of The Growing Giraffe, which is immensely interesting. Started by Rukmini Banerji, born and raised in Kolkata, and a lawyer by profession. A few years ago, Rukmini became a mother and realized the importance of providing her baby with healthy food.
When she started exploring for snacks, quickly realized that there is a scarcity. But she was determined.
She quit her job and started researching the healthy snack market in India for kids.
Finally, in December 2020, she took the plunge and started The Growing Giraffe – a brand that focuses on creating healthy cookies and bars for kids in the age group of 0-5 years.
Today, her brand is selling on Amazon, First cry, and other platforms.
She pursued two courses in baking as well and also has a team of food technologists, chefs, and nutritionists, supporting her to develop healthy snacks.
I believe the future for her brand is bright and she is hopeful that The Growing Giraffe will soon become a household name.
I have been brooding over a particular matter for the last few days. The matter pointed in a direction, which emphasised that kindness is hardly valued.
I was depressed and behaving unjustly. Temper, sleeping for long periods, high on screen time, basically in-toxicity.
Finally realising that condemning myself is un-purposeful and damaging. I finally decided to explain my problem to my dad.
The first question he asked me – ‘What does joy mean to you?’. He further asked me, if we moved into a bigger house will that give you joy? Will having more money give you joy? Or being kind to someone give you more joy?
He said, Son most things in this world are transient, be it house, money, power, emotions, etc. They are pleasures. Don’t be attached to them. Firstly, stop condemning yourself, in fact others love people who love themselves. They only pity or spite people who are self-condescending. Stop following transient or fleeting things or moments. They are there to test your ‘Self’.
At 77 years, I’m healthy, out on the streets making sales calls. How amazing is that? I’m proud of myself. I have committed many mistakes, and still do. That doesn’t in anyway, reduce self-love. Also don’t compare your situation to others. Everyone is suffering. You are in your 18th birth, probably another 1000 births to achieve salvation. Why give up now!
He then suggested that I read 2 chapters from Eknath Eswaran’s Bhagwat Gita for practical life. The chapters speak about will-power, how to build it, the importance and making it a characteristic, integral for your life. It shared a phrase from Robert Frost’s poetry – Stopping by woods on a snowy evening.
The woods are lovely, dark and deep. But I have promises to keep, And miles to go before I sleep, And miles to go before I sleep.
I am pasting these lines on my mirror and read it everyday to remind me of will power.
As I call it a night, I’m at peace with myself and believe the day has ended with joy.
Thank you Dad. What would I do without you.
For the seeker who would live in the fear of god and would see him face to face, restraint in diet both in quality and quantity is as essential as restraint in thought and speech.
School students in Ladakh – Courtesy journeyswithmeaning.org
Today there are 1.5 billion travellers across the world. Just a fraction of them or rather a negligible fraction of these travellers understand the cruciality of responsible tourism and a handful of them put them into action.
Post pandemic, we set out to break away from the routine, unleash the wanderlust, to pave a way for our free spirit, blinded by our passion. We fail to realise in this fervour to travel, we are being irresponsible with our travel and to the destinations travelled.
For many years, I was oblivious to the responsible tourism or travel. All this changed in 2015, when I first travelled to Ladakh and realised the threat caused by tourists to the place.
What is irresponsible tourism?
Irresponsible tourism comprises any activity or product that risks disrespecting, suffocating, exploiting, polluting and causing suffering in the local wildlife and human population, as well as the environment of any given destination.
All stakeholders are equally responsible or irresponsible for tourism, be it operators, hoteliers, government, tourists and locals.
The tourism industry, majority of it, fail to implement amends or educate travellers or tourists to highlight the serious issues and impacts of our travels to many destinations.
Travellers for their quest for the much needed break, just turn a blind eye to irresponsible travel.
Locals, in their rush to cater to the needs of the tourists, seek for short terms benefits, without realising that their long term is significantly jeopardised.
Through my website ecotravelleraj.com, the intent will be to educate you on responsible tourism and navigate you to think about how to be a responsible traveller and reduce your negative impact on the world.
You must be wondering what is responsible tourism!
“Tourism is a genuine driver of solidarity and development. Let us all fully harness its power to bring people and communities together, abiding by the Global Code of Ethics for Tourism. This way tourism can keep delivering better opportunities and sustainable development for millions across the globe.” Zurab Pololikashvili, UNWTO Secretary-General,August 2020
But my personal favourite is a quote by the renowned American writer – John Steinbeck“People don’t take trips, trips take people.” – each trip brings surprises, diversions, and discoveries. A true traveler embraces these…in fact, looks forward to them.
Before we take the first step, let’s understand certain nuances of responsible tourism. In one line “Making better places for people to live in and better places for people to visit.”Responsible tourism encompasses all aspects of tourism, not just nature based, but emphasis on creating a better life for the locals and better place to visit for travellers and tourists.
Responsible Tourism requires that operators, hoteliers, governments, local people and tourists take responsibility, take action to make tourism more sustainable. ex. of government taking responsibility.
Devil on Wheels is an organisation covering 17 villages in the Himalayas. It was set up to help the local community that earns its living from tourism. Devil on Wheels connects local guides directly to travellers so the guides are not exploited by the middlemen. They also help tourists contribute to the villages with medicines and education kits that locals may need
Kerala is the one state that is that leading the way in setting up of RT destinations. Some of these destinations are Kumarakom, Wayanad, and Kovalam. Each of these locations showcase what is known as the ‘Village Life Experience’. For example, in Kumarakom you can take a ride in a country boat, watch the toddy tappers at work, or go bow-and-arrow fishing. You will see how coconut tree leaves are used to thatch roofs and make brooms, the shell are made into card and soap holders, and actual coconut turned into oil. There are a number of RT certified hotels in Kumarakom, too.
Sustainable tourism is a vague aspiration, has been there for a long time and achieved very little.responsible tourism something different, it’s about the positive action we take to make tourism better to make it sustainable.
Dr. Harold Goodwin – RT partnership and Emeritus professor at Manchester university
Stepping outside your comfort zone isn’t easy. There are way too many changes that one has to be prepared to deal with. Especially if you are an urban teenager, travelling to a new place, with a new set of people who you haven’t met before. It’s too much to ask for, isn’t it? A new place means new people, unfamiliar cuisine, language, weather conditions and a new set of rules and customs to keep in mind! It’s not easy…
How do we reach these Urban teenagers?
Traditional Marketing – Connect with school and colleges. Arrange for live sessions to talk about travel and responsible tourism. Get environmentalist speaker and travel bloggers to give their snippets on to develop sustainable tourism, to have a positive affect on the planet.
Online marketing – Today all classes are online. The best way is to set-up a webinar or online event in association with companies promoting eco-friendly travel and tourism in different parts of India. Keep it interactive, get young travellers to share their responsible tourism experience and how has it transformed their approach to travel. How they have taken the baton to promote responsible tourism among their peers.
Of course, we must follow the CATT method if we really want to create a tribe and keep the audiences engaged.
Content: This is crux of your marketing ammunition. The content has to be upbeat, nourishing, real and heart felt.
Attention: Has to be witty. Has to be empowering. Has to be experiential. It must be a great story, which is relatable, sharable and conversation worthy.
Trust: Don’t sound as a revolutionary. You want a tribe, not a cult. Share your learnings, your vulnerability, don’t shy away from your emotions. They will go a long way in creating a bond and eventually trust with your audiences. Get credible bloggers and environmentalists to write for your website and probably backlink your blogs as well.
Transact: Finally, pitch for the programs or courses that your want them to purchase or enrol. Pricing is key, as they are the direct buyers, rather influencers for the actual buyers, in this case parents.
If you are approaching schools, you may follow the similar process of CATT and definitely personal branding. Have a professional website, social media platforms in place, with relevant and quality content.
In conclusion, India today have more than 17Mn travellers and possibly <1% of them are aware of responsible tourism. We are travelling greedily and selfishly.
Being socially and culturally aware when you travel (i.e. use more common sense people!), understanding your affect on the places you visit and trying to make that affect a positive one.
That’s it! Not so complicated right? Imagine if even just a sizeable fraction of those 17 million travellers made a few small changes to the way they view their travels and how they interact with the cultures they visit. It could change the world it such an amazingly positive way.
Disclaimer: Hook-ups/ONS/something casual through online dating apps, this blog is a waste of your time.
Dating has many facets. For many it’s ‘The road not taken earlier.’ People join dating apps with multitude emotions – hope, frustration, fun, exploration, loneliness, stress-reliever and another 10 more emotions.
Most of us join dating apps without purpose or meaning. Treat it as a social media platform. That’s a recipe for disaster.
Look at this as a sapling, if you love gardening. Humanise it. Make an avatar and you will fall in love with it.
Let’s start by knowing some history and facts of dating.
An era when dating was known as courtship!
Here are some history that I found interesting about dating.
The word ‘date’ was coined by an American journalist / writer, George Ade. During his conversation with a clerk named Artie, whose girl friend was losing interest in him and meeting other men, he said “I s’pose the other boy’s fillin’ all my dates?”
In the 1900s, women were paid far less than men (I’m going somewhere with this), the average pay for women was less than half of that of men in the same position. So now you know the origin of men expected to pick up the cheque on a date. Of course, the system has transformed over the century.
Statistics and fun facts of dating.
On an average, in US & EU there is an even representation of gender across dating sites. In India though, men represent the larger population.
The dating industry is estimated to be $3.2 Bn by end of 2021 with 370Mn customers worldwide.
India has almost 31Mn users, with Tier II cities showing higher growth and penetration, post pandemic.These are stats based on US online daters. In India though, certain that my tribe holds the majority!
Many say online dating sucks, I believe people suck at online dating.
Online dating is tough, especially for those seeking real and genuine relationships.
You are already marred by a sizeable bunch of jerks, creeps, pervs, stockers. To top it all, the women seeking LTRs and marriage, fiercely guard themselves.
The guard railings are terribly high to manoeuvre. Relax. Breathe. There are ways to manoeuvre.
Then, the online dating apps are treated some social media platform, kuch mat karo…sirf swipekaro! If you only do that on the dating app, either you quit or end up with carpal tunnel syndrome!
Dating can be seriously fun if you are willing to enjoy the process of the 4Es – Explore, Experiment, Engage and Emote.
And as a marketeer let me share some marketing techniques could get you better at dating.
Here are some processes to better your online dating skills – Profile optimisation, A/B testing, Conversations to engage well which require a different skill set than IRL!
Before starting, let’s be mindful that the sharings are based on my context, preferences and mindset and could be different for you. Never mind. The intention is to stay open-minded and try it anyway.
I haven’t found someone special yet, but quite confident that this approach will give a greater probability of finding that special one. After using the marketing techniques, seen a surge in the responses.
Motivated a bit. Now let’s see how to do it!
Step #1 : Know why you are here – call it purpose setting.
There are 3 important aspects of life that are game-changing or life – altering : Your wealth, your health and your relationships. If you are a believer of this philosophy, be clear as to why you are dating online. Deep down everyone knows if they are in it for fun or something meaningful.
When I started visiting dating apps, this thought never occurred to me. Not taking my purpose seriously was a big mistake. I was swiping like a monkey. And the results were same as my biology test mark in college – a big zero.
I would have swiped at an embarrassing number of profiles, waiting for a miracle to happen! The only miracle that happened was that my battery died, forced me to dump my phone for a while.
It made me wonder why did I not get a single like or response. Must be doing something wrong and it was time to change my attitude and approach.
First decide what do want.
Go on a lot of dates.
Find a meaningful relationship.
Whatever your purpose, write it down. Share it with friends and family. Be true to yourself.
Remember “If you try to appeal to everyone, you will appeal to no one.”
You can call it the Law of Sacrifice. Kuch paane ke liye kuch khone toh padta hai!
Step #2: Profile optimisation
Firstly on any dating app, one you register, don’t rush to become a paid user. That doesn’t guarantee likes.
In most cases, men just slap any pictures of themselves on the profile, write something and start to swipe. I did it too. The classic Men Do mistake, ending up as what most sensible women would lament as bland, boring profiles.
Most researches mention that visuals are more appealing than text. The same phenomenon applies here too. Plus, less than 5 seconds to make an impression. So what to do?
Put effort behind the profile. Remember, your profile is equivalent to a lead magnet or an ad (in digital marketing terms.). It’s the hook to attract the right type of audience. In this case, women searching to connect with your type.
Firstly, choose the right set of pictures. They must represent your real appearance and reflect certain aspects of your personality. But don’t go overboard or be creative. Doesn’t work always almost!
Learnt the hard way! Don’t for a moment think that by uploading these over zealous pictures, you are doing a favour to womankind. The lesson learnt is, KEEP IT SIMPLE and REAL.
It took me a while to understand the whole visual aspect. The next step, took feedback from friends (mostly women) as to the images represent and reflect me the best. And here is the outcome.
My transformed set of images on one of the dating apps
Disclaimer: This is still WIP and requires regular and better additions / replacements.
In the real world, non-verbal communications play a vital role and sends signals. As Seth Godin, explains in his podcast that we choose to actively give signals, based on who we are. In the online world, your pictures do that for you.
My pictures signals that I’m someone who smiles, loves outdoors and prefers casual attire. And that’s the signals I chose to give.
Let’s move to the second and more vital aspect of your profile is the Bio. They are your niche. And don’t ever attempt to copy another man’s bio.
Your bio has to be structured and to do that break it up into 3 parts:
The Headline – a short and quick description of you.
The intro para – this will showcase your interests and personality. And definitely longer than the headline.
Call to Action (CTA) – A conclusion nudging the person to take a desired action.
When I wrote my first and second bio, I wasn’t aware about this structure. Wrote the first things that popped in my head or got a friend to write it. There was no structure, definitely no uniqueness or USP.
Many advice that BE YOURSELF in your bio. Don’t commit that blunder. Be yourself, but not totally.
My first bio said …
I’m a happy -go-lucky person, who enjoys fitness, movies, animals. I’m mildly lazy…blah blah blah (can’t exactly remember the rest). I was mighty impressed with the bio, especially thought the ‘mildly lazy’ was a creative touch and totally being myself.
When I showed the bio to a friend, she taunted me for the ‘mildly lazy’ comment, said it was least funny and portrays you in bad light. That was an eye-opener. Mostly things that your feel are the best, turn out to be the worst.
So I improvised…and got my friend to write it
Most people who know me say I’m friendly and easy to get along with. I’m an ambivert, with a passion for sports, fitness & marketing- not necessarily in that order! I enjoy travelling and am a movie buff! Here for a serious relationship, which of course begins with friendship! So —– me to know more.
Though this would to hit the ball out of the park. The result was slightly better, but the true purpose wasn’t achieved.
I love being outside as much as possible! Few of my favourite things are badminton and running. The creative kind, learning more of marketing and consulting. Movie addict, great friend, coffee drinker, a new found love for ecology and a Phil Collins fan. (Intro)
The response has been far better. Not saying, this is it. Still scope for improvement, and continue to learn and experiment.
Take time. Get your profile right. Remember you have less than 5 seconds to catch someone’s attention and with every step the should feel more engaged.
Step #3 : Experiment across platforms
Don’t die alone!
This is integrated marketing. The platform are the traffic sources.
When I started this journey, I registered on only one platform – Tinder.
Pictures, bio, other information. All done. And swipe swipe swipe. I was confident to get responses and did not even think of other platforms. Couple of days of swiping, I was stick sitting at on a score of duck.
Dismayed. Disappointment.frustrated. It was time to call the quits. Online is not for me. Can’t take this s**t anymore.
Better sense prevailed and I decided to try another site, see if something clicks. Joined OkCupid. Same set of pictures, improvised bio and started swiping.
So now, 2 channels, 2 different bios, same set of pictures. Paid user.
Some magic happened. Got a like on OkCupid. Kind of Eureka moment. And I started with the engagement.
I thought, the bio probably worked. So I changed the bio on my tinder account as well. The swiping continued. And finally got a response on tinder too. Seemed as a divine intervention!
Upped my game, moved from 2 to 3 platforms – new one being Bumble, with my latest structured bio. The results are were jaw dropping for Bumble. But OkCupid and Tinder did not yield any results with these new structured bio. Wait and watch.
Experimenting with different pictures for different platforms. L-R : OkCupid, Tinder and Bumble
The more the source platforms the better your chances of getting likes (in marketing terms – leads).
Keep experimenting. What works on one platform, may not necessarily work for the other ones. Customise as per the platform and audience you are seeking.
I plan to add myself to 2 more platforms with free version. Organic approach.
Step #4 : The art of engaging and emoting.
This is where the actual game begins. And your job is to keep playing. Don’t keep scores. Play your natural game. Listed a few engagement rules to play better.
Rules of engagement #1: Read the profile thoroughly. For many it’s the equivalent of a resume.
Don’t simply swipe on the basis of a picture. Women will see through it and un-match you faster than a cowboy draws his gun. Be sure about why you swiped right on a profile, at most times.
This is why I swiped right on the profile. Flash news: We are conversing!
Take time. Dive deep as much as possible with the data available. Check what works for you. Zodiac sign, relationship status, interests, etc. Be thorough and mindful. The person on the other side might just be the one!
Rules of engagement #2: The opening line.
You did the hard work. Took the effort. And someone liked you. Stop celebrating excessively. Take a breath.
The first line you type will practically decide your fate.
Opening with a ‘Hey’ ‘Hi’ or ‘wrydn’ (google it) usually aren’t impactful conversation starters. Don’t be too witty or outsmart yourself. Use the data provided to your advantage.
QUIZ
Based on the above profile, which of the following conversation starters you think performed the best?
A) “Hey! How’s it going?”
B) “Hey! How was your weekend?”
C) “Question: Football or cricket?” (or something similar)
D) “Hey! Which book are you currently reading?” (based on a book they listed in their profile)
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If you answered D, you are a fast learner.
Others conversation starters that worked as well (because of lack of data) – Hi, How has been your day? (if you are chatting late evening or night.
Ask a question. Have some conversations around it. Avoid being monosyllabic. Feel free to state your thoughts, but don’t go overboard.
After chatting for 2 mins, do not ask for her number or ask her to meet. She will un-match you in a flash.
Rules of engagement #3: Timing
Timing is extremely important. Woh kahavat toh sunni hogi – Waqt se pehle Aur naseeb se zyada Kisi ko kuch nahi milta.
Take time to know the other person. Do talk about your interests, but don’t let it be an epic monologue about your political views, favourite sportsmen or your work.
Take the lead in asking questions as required.
Rules of engagement #4 : Don’t chase shadows.
Give some breathing space. Constantly messaging maybe harmful. If the person on the other side is conversing with you, she will continue to converse.
While I was engaging with someone, on the second day, we chatted for 2 hrs straight. I lost track of time, till she gave me that statistic. The timing was right for me to check with her if she wants to transition to WhatsApp and she promptly said Yes.
Bring your energy and enthusiasm to the conversation. Be comfortable and natural.
Rules of engagement #5 : Say NO.
If you don’t know something that she mentioned, just say so. Honesty is highly appreciated. And you are not expected to be an wikipedia.
Try these tips and techniques and you would just be surprised!
The Economic growth!
The pandemic has brought a paradigm shift in online dating. Because of the lack of IRL meeting opportunities, the tide has moved online.
Globally the online dating industry is expected to grow at CAGR of 9.3% y-o-y making it $5Bn industry by 2024. Today the industry value stands at $3Bn.
The online dating app – Bumble is planning to launch its IPO with a valuation of $6 – $8Bn. Things are exploding in this industry.
India is the second largest market for online dating in terms of revenue. In the pandemic, reverse migration has facilitated the explosion of online dating in Tier II cities.
As per Indian express report, Truly Madly reported a 7 fold revenue growth in Bhubaneshwar, Jammu, Kanpur, Patna, Rajkot, Varanasi, and Vijaywada, post the pandemic, much higher than metros.
Of course, there are challenges with inadequate and half-baked or unidentifiable profiles of women (the stigma and the lack of faith of online dating), will impede their engagement, eventually leading to users exiting the platforms.
It’s imperative that online dating platforms educate their users about trusting them and provide a sense of security.
How sexual orientation works for daters online.
As per a research, the LGBTQ community are prone to have positive experiences with online dating as compared to straight ones. Here are some stats in the US.
55% of LGBTQ adults use online dating vs 28% straight adults.
28% of LGBTQ adults get married through online vs 11% straight adults
Of course there are downsides as well.
56% LGBTQ adults have received a sexually explicit message vs 32% straight adults
41% LGBTQ adults have been called offensive names on any one of the apps vs 25% straight adults.
At an overall level, the LGBTQ community dating show positive response rather than straight adults.
Take aways and next steps
Just as marketing, online dating is scientific as well.
It’s a highly competitive market. There is pressure. It’s not just about the end result, in fact the customer journey is far more important.
Do your research and state your goals clearly. Stay purposeful.
It’s important to find your niche.
Your profile is your lead magnet. Build it well. Be authentic.
Understand that dating is a game of perception. Rooted in reality. And You are the product.
Remember the 4E’s – Explore, Experiment, Engage and Emote.
Keep checking profiles, keep swiping but consciously. Don’t treat this as your social media account!
Use multiple platforms for your sources. Also one – fit for all may not work. Customise.
Have a structured bio, use good clear images and provide real information.
Use the CATT strategy. Content-Attract-Trust-Transact. This blog has Content, Attract and touched upon Trust.
In this blog, have used my own experiences and knowledge with the hope that it will help others to get better at online dating. I am for shared success.
I will continue with my experiences and experimentations and plan to share the next part of this topic in the coming month as well. Till then, happy dating.
If you enjoyed reading my blog, please leave a comment.
I’m pursuing an Internship program, which is transformative and pragmatic. The article is a part of the Digital Deepak Internship Program. To know more about DDIP, click on the link. https://digitaldeepak.com
I was pleasantly surprised to be asked to wear a fitness attire for the interview to begin at 6.30am. An unusual request never experienced earlier. Nonetheless, I decided to risk it and see what was in store for me. Finally, I landed at his place, a beautiful quaint house in the outskirts of Nashik, with an exquisite garden and filled with the song of the fragrance of the flowers. Being winter, a perfect time to snuggle into a blanket and sleep, yet the magnetism of this person, forced me to resist my instincts and indulge in a conversation with Ajay Natarajan, a social entrepreneur, fitness enthusiast, reformer, environmentalist and speaker.
It was 6.40am and there was Ajay, on the porch wearing a cycling outfit with eyes closed and smiling. I walked up to him and interrupting his penance with a HELLO. Ajay opened his eyes and got up and hugging me, said ‘I’m a hugger.’ Then he quickly handed over a bicycle helmet and gloves, heading towards a couple of bicycles parked near the porch. I was dumbstruck and nervous since I had not ridden a bicycle for many years. He looked at me, understanding my predicament, saying “I will be riding along with you and I have been doing it for last 3-4 years and trust me, you will be fine, even though you have not ridden a bicycle for sometime.” Finally, I hopped on to my cycle and he quickly explained me some basics of cycling and the gear systems, kick-started the ride. After a few minutes of riding, arrived at a cafe called CONVERSATIONS. Seating ourselves, ordered our drinks and started with the interview.
Having following you for almost one year, seems that you have your hands in quite a few areas such as social entrepreneur, fitness, sports enthusiast, part-time actor, writer, environmental advocate, teacher, animal lover and volunteer? So, which of these takesprecedence in Ajay Natarajan?
I began this journey as a human evolving to be better version of myself having vividly remembered the day when I wrote to myself as to who I want to be and have a sense of fulfilment and gratitude now. A decade ago, while dealing with a personal crisis, I took a take trip to Ladakh when my cousin, Vinod (founder of Journeys with Meaning) organised eco – trips to Ladakh. This trip was life-altering and I returned bck home feeling light, harmonious and energetic! An unforgettable experience!
From that moment, it was always lingering at the back of my head to be part of Journeys with Meaning in a purposeful way and provide these experiences to other people, especially children, since I enjoy interacting and engaging with them. My nephew N will vouch for it! Today, Vinod, his wife Neha and me are co-owners of Journeys with Meaning, working with schools to organise ecology trips to places across the globe. Partnering with over 100 schools across India, Sri Lanka, Nepal and Bangladesh, delivering over 200 memorable trips for their children.
Rising from my passion for fitness & sports, started an initiative – FITNESS FOR ALL, building fitness foundation for children in Government schools. This initiative being associated with 25+ villages in Maharashtra, wherein Physical Education trainers travel to the villages twice weekly, conducting fitness classes. We have a mentorship program to teach them life skills and values through sports.
Certain facets such a my acting, short story writing help me to experiment and learn. I am self – admirer of my acting skills, so much for my modesty, wishing to showcase my talent. As a writer, I observe and curate my life experiences with friends, family, nature and animals into short stories, having a social message.
Being an environmentalist, I started realising in 2020, when the COVID pandemic hit, the importance of ecology, sustainability and the interconnectedness between nature and humans. As an advocate and teacher, having been associated with few institutes for conducting sessions and workshop along with my mentor, friend, cousin and guide Vinod on environmental issues impacting human lives, sincerely believe, only we humans can save the earth by living in harmony with nature!
Social entrepreneurs, are known for their social impact, rather their company valuation. Do you agree with me? Also how has your relationship been with wealth & finances?
Glad you asked me that question. For the longest time, I undervalued money, the typical ‘haath ka meil’ attitude. In 2021, I was under certain financial burdens. It dawned then that I need to change my attitude and a life altering event happened. I signed up for an internship program by Deepak (of Digital Deepak fame). It set me on a path of rebuilding myself and enforced me to build a positive relation with money. Today, Journeys with Meaning and my environmental workshops, creates sufficient assets, valued in double digit crores! In addition, as a marketing consultant, work with other social entrepreneurs and start-ups, generating income.
What are your Mantras for a successful life?
My mantras..
Home cooked south Indian food whenever possible
Attempting to “Saving the planet.”
Visualising your future and a Personal roadmap
Making trips with school children and listening to their shares at the end of the trip
Animal lover
Powerful and real relationships
Sharing quality time with family & friends
Physical activity – fitness or sports, at least 30 -45 minutes
Writing my 5 minute journal everyday,
Dancing
Laugh at myself, when I am criticised for my acting,
Sharing our knowledge and experiences through my stories
Reading books
Watching movies
Spending and investing wisely
6-7 hours of sleep
Living as if there is no tomorrow
Social work
Mentors
most inspiring poster
Favourite click
Nothing out of the ordinary. These are from the top of mind, not particularly in the order of preference. Believe that people are motivated differently, depending on their passion, dreams, visions and love.
So,what motivates you?
Compassion, plan for the future but live for today, gratitude, hard work, acceptance, kindness, being part of a community, passion, service to others, simplicity, running my own race and expressing my love.
Tell us about your love-life. What’s your status?
I’m in a relationship, not married though, as Y (my partner) and me do not believe in the institution of marriage. Y, is a successful professional, CEO of ABC company, TEDx speaker, author and . women empowerment activist. She co-founded an initiative for farmer empowerment – helping them digitisation and selling directly to customers. Presently pursuing her second book, which I secretly becomes a best seller.
Finally, how do you visualise your future?
Doing a lot more of what I am doing presently. Want to be an environmental ambassador for India thereby create a bigger impact. Grow my own vegetables, place Journeys with Meaning on the global map, presence of Fitness for All across 5 states, backpacking with my partner, learn to jive, publish a book of short stories, hopefully sign a Bollywood movie co-staring with Aamir Khan, climbing a few mountains, Bungee jumping from at least 700ft and run a full marathon.
Member of the assembly
Journeys with Meaning Juniors
Taking the plunge
As we wrapped up the interview, the cafe owner and a close friend of Ajay, walked upto us and greeted us. Ajay introduced me to him and gave me a quick history about the cafe and the owner, R. Speaking to R for a few minutes, it dawned to feature him as well, soon.
We cycled back to Ajay’s house, where I met his pets – Jaggu (dog) and Mia (cat), waiting patiently on the porch, for their food. Bidding goodbye to Ajay and his pets, I was inspired by his work, mantras and a heart as big as the down over the wide hills.
The article has been written by J K, journalist for inc.com and profiles emerging social entrepreneurs. She also a strong advocate on LGBQT issuesand develops policies and laws on LGQBT for GoI.
The pandemic has given re-emergence to the saying ‘Health is Wealth’. Many of us lived through it with fear, adjustments and redesigning our lives to suit the new normal, especially health. But it doesn’t stop here. If we truly believe health is our wealth & fortune, why don’t we manage it the way we manage our wealth. Most, i know, have a wealth portfolio, in terms of real estate investments, stocks, mutual funds and more, which they monitor and track daily to enable it to grow. Portfolio managers or advisors are appointed to provide tips and guidance on how to grow your wealth. Following the stock market closely, listening to experts gives a sense if our investments are on the right track. Then, why don’t we apply the same rule to our health?
I am surrounded by people who suffer from Chronic illnesses – BP, Diabetes, Hypertension, Cardiovascular diseases, Cancer and other illnesses. So when I spoke to few of them, i was able to conclude that most of them do not have health goals, medical portfolio / record, daily tracking and monitoring of their health, ability to identify symptoms leading to emergencies, access to quality health manager guiding them, etc. The norms of medical treatment are mainly traditional, visiting a doctor or physician who uses a pen-paper for subscribing medications and limited time for consultation. This process, i believe has to be redefined. Today, patients do not require only medications or diagnosis, there needs to a process for tailoring treatment, higher patient engagement, coaching patients and care-givers and empowering self-care effectively.
So how do we redesign Healthcare?
Make patient the focal point : The most important requirement for redesigning healthcare is that patient’s needs & expectations are on the same page. Design services in a way that will bring needs and expectations together
a. Patient’s trust & safety
b. Access to support
c. Patient engagement
d. Technology for providing evidence based care
e. Literacy of patients
2. Use of data for treatment and consultations : data is the cornerstone for improvement. It will provide the medical history of the patient, how is their current health trending, access to their vitals and medical reports, track changes and allows monitoring and comparison for sustainable improvement. Data-driven insights help better outcomes, identify symptoms or changes in health patterns to avert medical emergencies, reducing medical errors and providing care-givers to view patient’s health status. Basically, Remote Patient Monitoring (RPM) an integration of qualitative and quantitative methods of data collection are required for improvement of healthcare systems.
3. Chronic Care Management (CCM) : This is a critical aspect of redesign, providing access to care co-ordination an on-going basis. This is the human factor, wherein a care coach or manager, will understand patient’s medical health and history, device tailor – made care plans, set health goals, engage with the patient & care-giver, provide counselling as & when required and help track and identify variations in health. These care coaches or managers should be doctors or medical experts, who should collaborate with the patient’s doctor with their diagnosis and treatment, improving efficiency in delivering healthcare.
In recent times, few organisations and start-ups, in India, have built solution platforms to cater to these requirements. One such start-up, Sperantes Healthcare, based in Mumbai, started trials with Chronic patients and were able to avert an emergency for a patient. Says Dr. Kirti Nigalye, co-founder of Sperantes Healthcare “Our care coordinator manager, after creating a care plan for the patient, suffering from diabetes, remotely monitored and tracked the patient’s health vitals daily and realised certain abnormalities in his health. The patient was immediately informed the patient to conduct certain tests, followed by hospitalisation, which certainly averted an emergency situation for the patient.” Also Sperantes, developed a tech platform for patient and care-givers to monitor and track vitals. To know more, please check http://www.speranteshealthcare.com for further details.
To conclude, effective health services require a human relationship based on trust. The most effective health models are those that build coach-like relationships between healthcare professionals and patients. When technology is inserted, it is all about data collection, the generation of actionable clinical information, and the extension of the capabilities of our healthcare professionals to provide care in a more proactive model.
A strange topic to write about, and i have not researched if anyone has ever written about it! Today, I, after many months, took the initiative of washing my shoes. This initiative, of course was the brain child of my mom, who could no longer tolerate the sight of my dirty shoes. I am not sure if it was the appearance or the fragrance which inspired her to mention it.
Finally, after a 15 kms run last Sunday, i decided to do the kind act of washing my shoes!. Lest, did i realize that it will be an emotional (not the Saas-Bahu melodramatic kind) but the purest one can feel.
As i started washing my shoes, first i could only see the dirty water flowing out. It was a reminder of the distances i have covered running, training, drills, circuits, playing sports, which has eventually settled on my shoes as dirt. From an external experience, it was dirty water, but for me it signified nothing less than the Ganges water. Of course, appearance-wise, there wasn’t much difference between the water from my shoes and the Ganges (lol).
Next came the scrubbing of the shoes, and it struck me ‘Abe yeh joothe (shoes) ko kitna ragda hai.’ All the sweat (as i perspire more than average) from the runs to the circuits to the plyometrics to the cross-fits has trickled into my shoes (to some reading this may sound slightly gross, but see the emotions behind it :)) and i felt more emotional that i was washing away all the effort and hard work! And i thought, why am i doing it, since in the next 48 hours the shoes is going to hit the grounds and start getting dirty again! but i continued…
The climax, wringing my shoes, my laces, and my soles, reminds me of all the passion and the commitment, pushing myself to finish that 25th crunch, collecting every bit if whatever stamina left to go all out for the last 200 – 300 mts, completing the long runs inspite of the humid conditions, in-short squeezing every ounce in me to give it all! That feeling of fulfillment is worth everything!
As i was hanging my shoes in the sun to dry, i knew that my pair of shoes are my pals, my guide, my support and they need to be given their due respect. To more miles, more memories, come on shoes, let’s keep going! A new day and a new road awaits us!
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